The topic is nakedness. Yes, I know, it is sort of off the beaten path, not the norm, socially sensitive and downright gutsy to discuss. Well discuss it I will, despite it may prove embarrassing to both of us. BTW, did you ever notice that the word “embarrassing” implies a “bare ass?”

I have other family members living with me who, by now, should really be out on their own adding to the real estate tax base and cluttering their own front lawn with pink flamingos and such. But, be that as it may, I commented to a friend that once these people leave I will immediately walk naked downstairs, just for the feeling of being liberated within my own home. Friend wrote back that he was not sure he welcomed the vision of my descending the steps to the lower floor “naked as a light bulb.” I pondered that reference for a moment, wondering if a naked light bulb could be considered a turn-on.

Nakedness is so much easier to contemplate as a cliché such as “naked as a jaybird” or the “naked truth.” It is such a conflicting concept to ponder since we all wish to see some others bare it all while others certainly not. Why is it we display a solid unwillingness to openly display our body’s natural state of being, knowing bare well that we are the only creatures on earth who cover ourselves, let alone constantly fatten one of our more thriving industries by doing so?

Nakedness, when you stop and think about it, is all around us.  The dog, the cat, even the parakeet prance and tweet all day without a moment’s thought of reaching for a towel or a fig leaf.  We go to the zoo and have no problem observing wild animals being wild.  Nakedness is all natural in the animal kingdom, although it’s probably the only time we deny being part of it.

I know, I sound like a nudist and I hasten to mention that I am not, never have been and never would be…I don’t think. I do know that age and structure have much to do with the issue. Nakedness does compliment the young and well-proportioned bodies among us. Beyond that, nakedness takes on an entirely different state, from maybe being interesting but not attractive, to downright ugly. My personal vision, as I glance at the mirror, is as unpleasant a sight as anyone could imagine, though perhaps hilarious if portrayed in a cartoon with an appropriate caption. So nakedness is simply a state of mind and body…and age.

My wife and I, now embedded within the senior stage of life, have noticed with some disappointment that our butts have disappeared. Old age does that to butts. It shrivels and sinks them, leaving a noticeable sag in one’s trousers. Other parts of the body are similarly affected by the aging process, but I do not think I need to illustrate further. You get the picture…and if you do, please hide it.

Certainly there is a positive effect to be said about being naked. It takes on an entirely different meaning, and sensation, when transpiring between young lovers. After all, the thrill of first time is among the more private—and most valued—memories we all take to our graves along with our sagging body parts.  Sex, a relative by-product of nakedness, is what sells magazines, puts people in seats at the movies and supports an entire industry that features people with no clothes on doing other nature-endorsed activities.

I suppose I could carry on a bit more about this topic, but there is really nothing more to expose. I have avoided any kind of cover-up and I have been more than honest here, or revealing is perhaps a better word. I have never discussed this topic before and probably won’t again. Mind you, I have bared it all merely based on an off-the-cuff reference made by a friend regarding a light bulb as it related to a vision he had of my arriving naked at the bottom of my stairway. Granted this is no stairway to heaven, but if my tenants ever do move out and if I do, indeed, go naked into the living room…the dining room…and the kitchen, I shall most definitely feel liberated…and no doubt find the air conditioning unbearable.



About Marc Kuhn

I am a retired radio exec. I've worked at major stations in Philadelphia, Washington, D.C. and Miami. That was then. This is now: I've published seven books and this blog thingy. Need to know more? Really? Okay, I bare/bear all at The other links are for the websites of each of the books I've written. I've been busy! Hope you'll stop by and check them out. Thanks for your interest!
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1 Response to NAKED!

  1. rcarmean says:

    Air-conditioning in Florida in July-August is ALWAYS bearable –and necessary. Just like heating is necessary about 6 months a year up here. And if you do find the stairway to Heaven, let me know. My rancher doesn’t have it.


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