Well, we did it.  We finally did it.  After several years of putting up with stained, torn, dilapidated furniture, we went absolutely wild. Last week we replaced the 22-year-old sofa and love seat in the living room.  Today we bought new leather (sofa and love seat again) for the 20-year-old decaying furniture in the family room.  It is a joyful, albeit expensive, time in the Kuhn household.  No longer will we be embarrassed to have friends visits and have to subject their derrieres to being perched upon such dreadfully decrepit  platforms.  You get my drift.

New furniture is like a new car.  There are all the decisions about what brand to buy, what model, what options, what color, what size, what what what.  Rosemarie and I have become timid furniture shoppers.  Too often we have had buyer’s remorse because pieces we bought didn’t really look as good in our home as they did in the furniture showroom. Or, we found out too late that furniture, like other consumer products, doesn’t always hold up over a period of time.  There’s also the factor of taste.  What you like and think is cool one year is totally insipid and tacky a few years later.

And then there’s the cat.  Yes, the cat!  What to do about the cat?   Part of the reason we needed new furniture is that Toni the cat had destroyed portions of the old.  In fact, we have postponed buying new furniture  because we know Toni would love getting her claws into some new cushy fabrics.  Well, I have to tell you, we’ve been on the proverbial pins and needles ever since the new stuff arrived.  Toni is automatically attracted to anything new that comes into the house, whether it’s a discarded box from an amazon delivery,  an article of clothing, a new doormat, groceries, whatever.  So you can imagine what a hassle it’s been to keep constant vigil on the new furniture to make sure Toni is trained to stay off.  Can you teach old cats new trick?  Or is that a “can’t” like for dogs?

We are considering our options:  continue attempting to train Toni to stay off the new furniture; find a new home for her; or, worst yet, have her claws removed.  I also thought about putting her in the microwave for a few seconds every time we found her on the furniture but for some reason people’s reaction hasn’t been very supportive of that idea.  I even bought a bottle of special spray at the pet store that’s supposed to keep Toni away from whatever you douse it on.  Obviously, the manufacturer did not consult with Toni in the product’s R&D stage.

So while Rosemarie and I feel exhilarated having finally brought new life to our humble abode, we are unable to enjoy it to the fullest because of that darned cat.  And here I thought it was only children who cause you stress and anxiety, tear your heart out and destroy everything you’ve worked so hard to accumulate.  Meow!


About Marc Kuhn

I am a retired radio exec. I've worked at major stations in Philadelphia, Washington, D.C. and Miami. That was then. This is now: I've published seven books and this blog thingy. Need to know more? Really? Okay, I bare/bear all at The other links are for the websites of each of the books I've written. I've been busy! Hope you'll stop by and check them out. Thanks for your interest!
This entry was posted in Family, pets, Uncategorized, WHATEVER! and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s