I admit it, sometimes I take things too seriously. I have to learn to chill out and look at people and events with a changed paradigm. I always wanted to use that word in a sentence ever since I read The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. I made a list today of things I’ve over reacted to in the past and I vow that should situations likes these come at me again, I will respond in an entirely different manner. I thought it might be a good idea if I shared some of these with you. That way I would be embarrassed if I backed out of my commitment. So knowing that you know that I promised to do things differently, well, that would be enough to make me go through with the “new me.” Okay, here’s a list of some of the items I pledge I will handle differently…
1. When I am waiting for service at the pharmacy counter, I will no longer fume out of control when the car that just drove up to the drive-in window gets waited on before me, despite the fact that I may have already been standing in line since 1923. In the past I would have pretended that I had Tourette’s Syndrome and drop the f-bomb at the top of my lungs. The new me will now acknowledge that the person in the car is probably a lot sicker than I am and he needs his medicine to combat the disease curse that I have put on him and his family.
2. When I’ve slowed to let another driver cut in front of me because he is in a panic that his lane is disappearing and he must merge into mine, I will no longer get upset that he did not bother to offer me a little wave of the hand as an indication that he is grateful for my courtesy. In the past I would have sped up and overtaken him, aggressively cutting in front of him and forcing him to swerve suddenly and plow into the guard rail, sustaining considerable damage to his automobile and injuring the person in the passenger seat. The new me will now have the decency to pick up my cell phone and report the accident and request that an ambulance be sent for the injured passenger.
3. I will no longer yell at the news anchors on television. Even though the younger generation of these so-called newscasters have totally abandoned all the ideals and standards of American journalism that my generation and the one before it attempted to establish as the most ethical press in the world, I will forgive them their ineptitude. I will not scream at them when they have not done their homework, checked their facts and confirmed crucial information with more than one source….no, I will accept their mediocre reporting and sensationalist approach to “breaking news” as they call every story they talk about. This will not stop the new me, however, from urinating on a parked news van should I see one in my neighborhood. Film at 3am.
4. And finally, I will no longer get upset when a fellow blogger puts up a single photograph of a flower on his blog and under it is a caption that reads, “a flower.” And, then under that is a row of little icons from 34 people who “liked” his blog that day. I will no longer feel jealous that my blog, which took me considerable time and thought to construct so that I was offering a substantive few paragraphs of meaningful content that may make my readers laugh, cry or otherwise experience a little contribution to their daily life that carried with it something of merit. And below my presentation? Well, at least I have one faithful “like” I can count on…and perhaps that is actually more meaningful than 33 others. I pledge that the new me will no longer scream “What the hell do you want?” at my monitor’s screen as if all my readers are right there behind the glass panel. I will, nevertheless, still go to the corner of my closet, assume the fetal position, and moan in 4/4 time…for several hours.
Wow, this has all been a real catharsis. I should change my paradigms more often. It’s a cleansing kind of experience…sort of like the prep one goes through for a colonoscopy.
Books by Marc Kuhn: DEAD LETTER…Young love, misguided jealousy, a world war and a long lost letter whose shocking mystery is opened 40 years later; THE POPE’S STONE, an historical novel that follows two descendants of a Virginia family who, despite living a century apart, share uncanny similarities in their lives; NEVER GOOSE A MOOSE, a collection of whimsical verse featuring thought-provoking “never-do’s” that children should beware of; and ABOUT A FARM, a children’s book about challenges we all face every day, regardless of where we live. All three books are available at amazon.com and each has its own .com website under its title.
Intimate details about Marc Kuhn and other exhilarating stuff at marckuhn.com
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